I know plenty of you wish I wouldn’t, but I’m going to talk about the Ringer episode last night.

Sarah Michelle Gellar - The CW

The episode was titled “If you ever want a French lesson” and I’ve finally realized that each episode title is (likely) going to be a partial quote said by Siobhan. Which is very Damages of the show to do. And it also makes me think Siobhan won’t die for a while.

I’m still not in love with this show the way I feel I ought to be. Of course, I’m still not even near considering giving up on the show. Here are some scattered thoughts on episode 3:

  • There is no humor in the script at all. The Shiztini (?) was funny, but that’s it.
  • The script in general is lacking, the plot is okay… but the script needs to be less predictable. I feel like someone wrote this in their sleep.
  • Sarah Michelle Gellar oddly is always dressed to look overly thin or like she’s hiding a pregnancy. I’m sure their clothes budget is enough to pick some nice things. And occasionally they do. But tonight that shiny satiny coat over this hideous dress? Rachel Zoe would be appalled. Bridget is on the worst dressed list of last night with that thing. I mean. It’s like they tried to fuse Gone with the Wind with abstract art.  So they ended up with a strapless dress and a full skirt covered with triangles (ice pick imagery…which makes me think of that one horror/thriller movie.) Nope. The only thing the dress had going for it was the feeling was very dark and noir. Still, I’ve been very underwhelmed by the fashion choices. Like that red dress in the pilot? The fit was wrong. I’m sorry to sound like Michael Kors, but it’s SMG – you have to work at it to make her look less than gorgeous. Stop working so hard and just give her something simple in a silhouette that’ll flatter her. (And as for Gemma? Magenta pants are a big no.Tara Summers doesn’t deserve that.)
  • To be fair, there have been some nicer pieces from the costume department, too.

More after the jump.

  • Meanwhile, Siobhan and Bridget continue to have amazing hair minus the high Madonna ponytail of episode 2. We shall not speak of that. Except to mock it endlessly.
  • Just because a picture that a hitman had on him is one that your husband also has is a pretty weak idea to think he put the hit on you.
  • If Bridget knew they were going to torture Malcom, don’t you think she’d out herself or testify or do something other than just attend parties in NYC? Does she seriously think there are no consequences and she can just hide out? If she was smart she’d take money and run far, far away. Kind of like what Siobhan did. Siob might not be nice, but she seems to be the smarter sister. What do you think?

The show isn’t horrible…. But I’d rather be able to say something like “The show is amazing” than damn it with faint praise.

Are you still watching Ringer? Who’s with me in this?