Let’s not even pretend to debate this, the must-watch moment from American Horror Story Coven:”Burn, Witch, Burn!” is definitely the public burning of Myrtle Snow. (Or, to be more specific, all the moments leading up to the actual gross flamey stuff.)

Photo Credit: Michele K. Short for FX

American Horror Story – Burn, Witch, Burn! Review – Season 3, Episode 5

Fiona

…I can’t even start. Jessica Lange reminded us all what a fantastic actress she is, even when just wandering down a hallway.  I’m most curious to know if Fiona fully framed Myrtle or if some of the “flashbacks” we saw were real. I’d like to see more of her relationship with Delia, and I’m wondering if there’s more to the past that has yet to be revealed. (Not just small stuff, something huge and unforgivable.) I also wonder if Fiona will try to kill the real Supreme, since (now with detachable arm!) Madison was a dud.

Delia

Well, she’s screwed. And speaking of screwing… did she have a vision of what her husband was doing on his trip? You know, with the sex and the killing?

Her eyes do look like marbles. Yeesh. Talk about being a casualty of war.

Queenie

She’s dumb. So dumb. I’m not sure which moment cemented this idea… whether it was when she was wondering what the THUNK in the hallway was (during an active zombie attack) or when she lied for Fiona.

Laveau

Was she the one who blinded Delia with sulfuric acid? Why would she feel the need to hide in a black robe, unless making Fiona paranoid was part of her plan? But if it wasn’t the Laveau camp and it wasn’t Myrtle, then who?

The interesting thing about Laveau, this episode, was mostly what she illuminated for us… in that Zoe’s powers seemed especially strong to her. Does this mean she’s leading the race to Supreme?

Myrtle Snow

I’m glad she isn’t gone for good. I love her, her Grace Coddington vibe, and her killer retro glasses. She was framed pretty perfectly, and I’m surprised she didn’t put up more of a fight for that. But I guess the Witches Council proved that everything is essentially high school, and mean girls will always try to clobber you via bullying. Or something. I never dealt with bullies in high school, and I certainly wasn’t super popular, so I’m not sure how much truth there ALWAYS is in that gem, but it does SOUND right.

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Misty

MY FAVORITE GYPSY WITCH. Did I tell you I’m listening to Fleetwood Mac, now? Actually, mindfully listening, instead of just nodding that Stevie Nicks is a good singer with that pretty “Landslide” song. I’m impressed with my musical progress! Anywaaaay… Oh, and her OUTFIT with the dress and the shawl (it’s so hard to wear a shawl and not seem like a creepy old woman that wants to cook children in her stove a la Hansel and Gretel*) and boots was amazing. I want that outfit.

…Anyway, for real… Misty brought her fellow fallen witch back. Will Myrtle regrow her hair…and skin? It makes sense that Misty would bring back another witch that was burned, since that’s what had happened to her. Plus, she’s all lonely!

Zoe

I want to first state that I’m so glad that there wasn’t a moment where her Frankenstein-monster’s crush could sense she was in danger and swept in to save her. Instead, this girl got a chainsaw and got to work.

More and more, I find that Taissa Farmiga resembles Blake Lively, which is off-putting for me because Serena van der Woodsen would never not show more cleavage (even during a zombie attack.)

LaLaurie

We’ve started to stop hating on LaLaurie, and considering her a nice member of the family. Except, we had a rude awakening in this episode. Her daughters might have been burned alive because of her, but first, she tortured them. Ugh. She was a terrible mother! And she chained her daughters up in the attic for a year? Unspeakable.

Nan and Luke

Well, if Nan is a supreme, she certainly didn’t show any special powers. (Again I find myself glad we didn’t have a cliche moment of Nan’s power for fire to magically surface in order to save Luke.) As for Luke’s fate…who knows. But for now…Nan’s got a guy in her bed! Squee, squee, etc.

American Horror Story Coven Review Questions

1. Why did nothing Queenie did stop Borquita, but a poker would? Was it because it was iron or something?
2. How did LaLaurie not end up dead by Borquita when they were in the kitchen?
3. Did Fiona really see Myrtle in the hospital, or was that just a lie? If so, who blinded Delia?
4. How will Delia react to her husband, re: her vision.
5. Will Queenie be controlled by Fiona, or end up on the hit list?
6. Who’s the supreme?
7. What will Myrtle and Misty do?

*Ugh. That Hansel and Gretel season 1 episode of Once Upon a Time was probably the worst episode to date. Anyone agree?

American Horror Story Season 3, Episode 5 Summary

Burn, Witch. Burn!” – Besieged by Marie Laveau’s army, Zoe unleashes a new power. Fiona and Myrtle clash over control of the Coven. Madame LaLaurie is confronted by old ghosts.