For the power of Grayskull, Sookie channeled her inner She-ra in the True Blood episode “Don’t You Feel Me.”

Terry Bellefleur says goodbye. Photo: HBO

Terry Bellefleur says goodbye. Photo: HBO

Lafayette: Now let me get this hetero straight, so you’s a vampire that can come out in the daytime.
Warlow: Yeah, in a nutshell.
Lafayette: There go the damn neighborhood.

It’s hard not to feel like Lafayette in that moment. Every time we think we’ve seen the craziest thing that True Blood can offer us, they go above and beyond.

5. We’ll get to talking ’bout Sookie and Warlow in the sunny cemetery of sex later, but let’s focus on one nearly-overlooked moment there. Though Sook’s let Eric and Bill feed from her, she’s never tried to feed on any of them. No biting. But this time, Sookie was all “I am Sookie the fairy, watch me glow!” and girl got HERS. It was kinky and weird and …tasty? Who knows. But it was impressive, and different, for her. Raaaah!

4. It was no surprise that Jason aced his interview for entering the LAVTF. (His charm is immeasurable.) Sarah Newlin proved how cold and dead her vindictive heart was when she had Jason come in to watch a copulation study between two vampires. There was James (a quick fan favorite!) and Jessica. Oh, this was TENSE. And heartbreaking. We didn’t even need the action to happen for all of us to feel dirty and sad.

3. Bill beheaded Governor Burrell. Swift, blunt, and easy.

2. Terry Bellefleur, now calm and content, was murdered! Although, he’d asked for it. Literally. He’d hired an old friend to kill him. Still, we all felt rocked by this swift exit of one of the longest-running character on True Blood.

1. Sookie (the “danger whore”) decided to get HERS, uh huh. She disrobed, and climbed (mounted?) on top of a bound Warlow. They commenced to have such powerful vampire/fairy sex that a burst of glowing emerged. Talk about powerful.

This glowing fairy crotch will prove hard to top. But let’s all check back in next week to see what True Blood has given us in the next episode!

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