Let’s get right into it and talk about the most memorable quotes from The Office episode titled “Stairmageddon.” We’ve got a mouse, Lisa Loeb, and … Gwyneth Paltrow is on my TV, huh…. oh, and tranquilizers!

roseanne barr the office

Photo: NBC, Roseanne Barr

The Office Season 9 Episode 19: “Stairmageddon” Quotes

And a new word is born unto our lexicon….
Erin: Didn’t you get the memo? It’s stairmageddon.

That spot is already taken. By every girl in a dorm room playing a guitar for a webcam.

Andy: I wanted to be my generation’s Lisa Loeb.

Why is this character so awful now?
Andy: William Morris Agency. I need to speak to your best agent who represents your biggest stars.” Yes, he’ll hold.

Are there many bull’s in Scranton?
Dwight: Nothing to be alarmed about, it’s just a man pointing a bull tranquilizer as a coworker.

Did he remember that he was once engaged to her? No. He’s just jealous. Typical Andy.
Phyllis: Her hair looks beautiful.
Andy: Yeah we get it Phyllis. She looks like a freakin’ movie star!

He’s such a sucker…
Andy: (About Carla the agent.) Not just an actor’s agent. She does writers, directors, travel and real estate.

Just grab his ass.
Dwight: Grab his loins.
Clark: Say arms and legs. That’s the vernacular that I’m comfortable with.

Poor mouse.
Andy: What’s the mouse’s name?
Guy: It really doesn’t make sense to name the mice. They’re kind of like cannon fodder.

Ouch, man.
Jim: If I didn’t do certain things without telling Pam, she’d be … married to Roy.