The Bachelor 2012 premiered last night on ABC, and we learned plenty of lessons in the two hours we spent with Ben F. and a bunch of hopeful women.

Women can get catty, fast. It’s not that all women everywhere get catty. But the type that will go on a reality TV show? That’s a specific type of person. And plenty (not all) of these women illustrated in this first episode that they’re more than willing to indulge in every bad female stereotype that’s out there. We even heard a “oh, she just hates you because she’s jealous” excuse batted about. Because someone can only hate you if they’re jealous, not because you were a total beeyotch to them. Sure.

Lyndsie vs Lindzi: Only One Can Survive. We may not be fond of the way either of these names are spelled, but we did have a favorite – the horse-riding Lindzi. Her accent is adorable. As for Lyndsie, we liked her – but not for Ben. From the looks of her she seemed that she’d be a dumb blonde, but she’s well traveled and had a decent sense of humor – and bonus points for not seeming like a crazy person. She seemed genuinely sad that she wasn’t picked to stay. You know what, Lynds? We are too.

Self Promotion is easy, whee! Being on Reality TV is a great way to promote your blog. When The Bachelor 2012 premiered on the east coast, Jenna’s blog was so busy that the server shut down! She didn’t even say the full domain name, she just gave the general name and people found it easily enough. (The Over Analyzer.)  Jenna has very, very frizzy hair, and she’s quick to stumble over her words and whine. Basically, she’s prime reality TV show material.

Bicurious Women Also Want Ben F. Although the other ladies were calling Blakey and Monica “lesbians” and said they were “making out” we just witnessed a couple of tipsy women indulge in some heavy flirting. We’re willing to say they’re likely just bisexual. Monica was weirder about it than Blakey (Blakeley?), for sure. Whether Ben F. is cool with dating a bisexual woman is up to him.

The Bachelorette 2012 Spoilers: Apparently one of Ben F’s ex girlfriends is going to show up. And, the show wants us to believe that the person Ben proposes to (on the top of a mountain, aw) is going to say no. Man oh man.

Ben Flajnik is adorable: We’re all going to fall in love with him this season. He looks like Dax Shepard, he’s rich, successful, and he’s damn funny. He’s kind of perfect. Damn, is it too late to sign up?

Who was your most favorite pick of the women on the show last night? Who do you think should end up in the top five?