We all know that Schmidt’s new apartment is cool. Coach describes it as, “Nice, like a European airport.” So, you know it’s swanky.

max greenfield

Max Greenfield as Schmidt. His new apartment? Is awesome.

When Winston pointed out that there were so many “plush surfaces,” Schmidt said he would be taking advantage of them all.

“There are fifteen different bang spots. Each one specifically designated to its own sexual position.”

Schmidt’s Bang Spots on New Girl

  1. Standing
  2. Sitting
  3. Diagonal
  4. Why why because
  5. Closure of the lincoln tunnel
  6. Red beanbag chair (“…which is pretty obvious, but you know that’s a good one.” – Schmidt)
  7. Glass menagerie
  8. Backwards oops ( Of which Winson says, “I’ve done it but i didn’t know I was doing it.”)
  9. Tike share
  10. The star 68
  11. The Jumangi
  12. U Lock
  13. The Jean Michel Basquiat
  14. The Fabric Softener
  15. The Kansas City Shaker
  16. Nia Vardalas – BONUS
  17. Sex on the Rug  (“Again, pretty obvious but…why mess with a classic? – Schmidt) – BONUS
new girl, schmidt's apartment new girl, max greenfield

NEW GIRL: Schmidt (Max Greenfield, R) shows Winston (Lamorne Morris, C) and Coach (Damon Wayans, Jr., L) his newly decorated apartment in the “Exes” episode of NEW GIRL airing Tuesday, Feb. 4 (9:00-9:30 PM ET/PT) on FOX. ©2014 Fox Broadcasting Co. Cr: Jennifer Clasen/FOX