The Sarah Michelle Gellar helmed show continues to disappoint on The CW. This is devastating for her loyal fans (who continue to suffer through episodes), and mildly annoying to anyone else still watching this slop.

My favorite thing about Ringer continues to be Sarah Michelle Gellars hairstyles on the show. And despite what you might think, good hair is not enough to get by on.

Let’s start off with the good, shall we? Aside from SMG’s great hairstyles, she also had some great eye makeup in this episode. The fashion is generally pretty questionable, so that’s not really a highlight. I mean, what was with that leathery looking, super long halter top? Very California Cowboy.

I do continue to love Zooey Deutch as Juliet, and of course Logan Echolls aka Jason Dohring aka the hot teacher who will totally bed Juliet eventually. And Dohring had probably less than two minutes of screen time. This should be a telling indicator about what I thought of the rest of the episode.

And hey, another show on The CW totally put someone in all the promo photos and was billed as being a main cast member, only to kill them off before ten episodes. (The Secret Circle and The Vampire Diaries have both done this, and I’m sure there’s a few more.) Man, it must suck to be Tara Summers right now. Maybe she can go back to being a blonde, though. The red hair was not working for her. (Although, maybe Gemma’s not really dead and is, instead, hiding out in Paris with Siobhan. But I don’t even really care.)

The plot of this episode. Sigh. There was probably potential there but you can see everything so far around the bend that nothing ever surprises you with much impact. I see that the storytellers are trying to make it work, but I can tell them that it’s not. And the script itself really, really disappoints me. It makes me feel like I’m watching a daytime soap opera. And I never, ever watched those. Because they suck.

For those of you wondering what “sloppy storytelling” is in reference to, it’s about many things. But one big loophole is how Bridget-as-Siobhan was inexplicably drawn to Charlie. No one in the NA group said anything when Charlie, a first timer, became Siob’s sponsor? And Bridget has decided now is the time to trust Charlie completely, for no real reason? And hey, he used to be a cop and we know all cops in all departments get along so he can go peek at the case file (either he was lying or Bridget is really dumb about cops, which seems totally implausible given her whole criminal past) and help Bridget out. Totally!

And what about Malcolm? Well, the evil dudes had to spend forever using their drugs on him and keeping him locked up to try and get him to reveal the location. Then they had to stage a fake escape for him to lead them… back to Malcom’s house. Because Malcolm doesn’t know where Bridget is without the address. Meaning that, if I were a clever bad guy, I would have simply killed Malcolm, broken into his house, and gotten the address in one day. I’m not rooting for Bottoway, he just seems like an idiot.

And Malcolm see’s no problem in using his credit card, going to an ATM where he’ll be on video, etc? And seriously, think about yourself (cause Bridget wasn’t thinking of you) and just report directly to the cops and go to the hospital! Besides all of that? If they just took a sober guy and shot him up with drugs, wouldn’t this mean that Malcom would be in serious withdrawal and pretty much incapable of doing anything? Nope! He’s reading the newspapers to search out where Siobhan Martin’s gonna be, stalking her, helping her after she faints, and following her to the hospital (but never bothering to ask to speak with her.) Yea. This is a great masterplan. And I’m not talking about Malcolm. I’m talking about the Ringer execs.  Please make this show good enough to be at least called a guilty pleasure.

So, how did you feel about this episode? Do you think Gemma is really dead? Did you put this on your DVR just to see Jason Dohring?

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