Inside this Revenge review of “suspicion” we have talk of croquet, the weaponry masquerading as Ashley’s earrings, and who the biggest genius’ on the show really are.

Revenge Review ABC “Suspicion”

Charlotte (Christa. B. Allen) and Declan (Connor Paolo) are geniuses who are using Mrs. Grayson’s (Madeleine Stowe) urgency for all things to be “proper” against her. Victoria asked for a number – and Declan gave it to her. But he’s not going to give up seeing Charlotte. I can’t help but wonder if this sort of thing doesn’t happen a lot (in a world where Mother’s and Father’s are paying significant other’s to leave, that is.) Wouldn’t quite a few couples wise up to this scheming and decide to trick some money out of the heartless parents? And, in turn, wouldn’t these heartless (but smart) parents have some sort of contingency plan for when this doesn’t work?

Technically, Declan doesn’t have his money yet. Maybe Victoria will try to get him to sign a restraining order or contract or something to make it more official. Then again, if you’re paying someone to stay away from your daughter you probably don’t want an official papertrail… So. All in all? Genius plan. All people with jerk parents who are dating someone not approved by, go do this plan!

On the flip side of all of this, we have the Amanda Clarke (Emily VanCamp) and Emily Thorne (Margarita Levieva) situation. Or, should we just call the one girl Kara? Or Fauxmanda? It’s getting complicated, guys! Even though the real Amanda paid the real Emily for her name, that doesn’t stop her from coming back and demanding she get her way. And because she’s extra devious, she’s now claimed the fated spot as the real Amanda Clarke.

READ: Revenge Recap: “Inside a Vipers Nest”

This causes problems for Emily Thorne (fake version) for two reasons. First off, when word gets back to the Grayson’s about this, they’re going to be concerned about why Amanda Clarke is back. Secondly, the real Amanda is heartbroken! I mean, so many points go to Fauxmanda for pulling this stunt because it is legendary and it is so cruel! Girl is cold, yo. Poor Jack’s (Nick Wechsler) mind is going to be turned into slush by the end of this season.

I haven’t mentioned Tyler (Ashton Holmes) and Nolan (Gabriel Mann) and Ashley (Ashley Madekwe), yet. Well, isn’t that a fun little triangle of doom? Tyler is a jerk, even though I understand his anger about nepotism winning over ambition. Ashley has every right to hate him. He’s mostly just been using her, giving a few nudges of encouragement along the way. But those nudges don’t really make up for screwing with the gals heart. Neither does the Alaia dress he bought her.

Tyler and Nolan might be fun, but Ashley on her own is kind of fantastic. She’s been wearing fantastic clothing (and jewelry – did you see those weapon-like earrings she wore?!) and hiding in the background – being transformed from a party planner to a maid. (Which is insulting! Do you watch any decorating/party planner reality TV shows? Those people would not stand for this treatment. They’re usually almost as prissy as the hosts.) But now that Victoria has realized that Ashley is a font of knowledge, and Ashley realizes she can leverage that – it’s a whole knew game of … what do fancy people play besides beach volleyball? Croquet? It’s a whole knew game of croquet!

Grade: B-
React: Did you like the Alaia dress Tyler bought Ashley? What did you think of those earrings? Is Nolan the only one willing to be loyal to Emily?

Revenge Quotes – “Suspicion”

Amanda: If Emily wants me gone, she might have to consider the ripple effect.

Jack: You told me never to take dating advice from you.
Nolan: That was last week.

Tyler: Ambition versus nepotism. Game on.

Ashley: I swear these people are barking mad.

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Revenge airs on ABC on Wednesday nights.