So much happened on REVENGE again this week and yes, I applauded a bit when one of my biggest ‘ship happened towards the end. But let’s rewind a little and go back to the beginning.

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The walking dead
First of all, let me offer an apology for presuming that the reformed Fr Paul had died at the scene of the car crash. However, I was not far wrong as the dear father did not last much longer after being rushed to the hospital. Conrad, on the other hand, suffered just a few scratches. The accident rated enough to make it to the front page of the Hamptons paper but not enough to rouse daughter, Charlotte, to Conrad’s bedside. With the only other witness to the accident now dead, Conrad wasted no time in putting the blame for the accident on Fr Paul, saying that he had bought the car back in 1986 after test-driving it with Paul (back when he was just an ordinary man without the collar), and wanted to relive the past by letting Paul drive the Ferrari. Emily was the first on the scene of the accident but had to back up her father-in-law-to-be by confirming that he had seen Conrad come towards her from the other side of the car, away from the driver’s side.

Victoria joins the working class…sort of
With the Grayson family fortune gone, Victoria is barely keeping up appearances on the Hamptons party circuit. Son Patrick tries to talk her into selling off her beloved art collection and leaving Conrad and the Hamptons behind her to run away with him. But what would the Hamptons be without their Queen? So, as Daniel once said to his mother, a job is what people do to make money and so Queen Victoria decides to go back to her art gallerista past and pays an old “friend”, Sheila, a visit, offering her services at the art gallery. Sheila throws a party, inviting the Hamptons’ finest, showing off her new helper whilst at the same time rubbing salt in the wounds about the Graysons’ financial troubles. When was the last time someone dared to say to Victoria “there’s a track light that needs replacing”? Ouch!

Victoria gets her own back
Patrick has been doing and saying all the right things to Victoria since he turned up out of the blue. He’s an artist, like his mother, and he knows how much her art collection is worth. He has talked about it on more than one occasion, and then he turns up with one of her most expensive pieces at Sheila’s gallery, wanting to off-load it to fund his departure from the Hamptons. The ever-respectable Sheila feigned shock and surprise that he would dare suggest she buy a painting without the proper ownership papers. But of course, we know by now that everyone has a secret and it seems Sheila is not so respectable after all. She has apparently been known to dabble in a bit of blackmarket art dealing for those who can afford it.

Before you think that Patrick has been conning his mother this whole time, think again. Turns out he was totally helping his mother con Sheila out of her gallery, after her public humiliation of Victoria as her “new help”. Victoria tells Sheila that she is guilty of larceny and that if she doesn’t hand over her gallery, she would call the police and tell them all that Sheila is guilty of. And so, before the welcome party is over, Victoria has gone from being an art gallery employee to art gallery owner. Bam! Thanks for playing Sheila, and don’t let the door hit you on your way out!

There’s still something suspicious about Patrick
No spawn of Victoria’s can be trusted. Against his better judgement, there was never any doubt in my mind that Nolan is fascinated by Patrick. From their first meeting at the beach club when Patrick was sunbathing, to their next meeting at Nolan’s housewarming party, there was always some spark between the two. But of course, Nolan cannot let himself get involved with Son of Satan without doing some proper due diligence. So, despite promising that his hacking days are well behind him after his stint in prison, he just couldn’t help himself. After bumping into a contemplative-looking Patrick at the beach club again, Nolan helps himself to Patrick’s wallet, and then dusts off his laptop to start digging into his past. Before you know it, Nolan is packing his bags for the sunshine state to “bump into” a mystery blonde in a park.

As it turns out, the blonde is Patrick’s ex-wife, who accuses him of being a loser and a liar, and then threatens to walk away. However, nothing stops a person in their tracks faster than twenty thousand dollars in cold hard cash. We don’t find out what Patrick lied about, until Nolan invites him to his house to tell him he knows the truth. Nolan takes a step closer to Patrick – and I held my breath for his next move – and Patrick steps back, accusing Nolan of being too presumptuous. But just as I was about to cry, Patrick closes in on Nolan and assures him that he did not get the wrong idea. Poor Victoria’s children all seem to make questionable relationship choices. I suppose the apples don’t fall far from the tree, right?

Daniel and Emily on the rocks again?
It’s not like it’s the first time Daniel and Emily seem on the verge of another breakup. This time, Emily is mad at Daniel for supporting his father, lying to the police about the car crash to avoid a manslaughter charge (mind you, she had her opportunity to at least throw some doubt into Conrad’s story if she would just say that she couldn’t be sure which side of the car Conrad emerged from when she arrived at the crash scene). She takes her revenge on him by announcing in his magazine bio that he had a DUI during his college days. He’s mad at her for sabotaging his new career and moves into the Grayson suite at the South Fork Inn. There are eight weeks to the big wedding – will they make it to the altar? (Does Emily get shot before or after they say ‘I do’?)

Jack joins Emily’s revengenda
On the surface, Jack insists he wants nothing to do with Emily’s revengenda and that he wants her to stay away. But when it comes to revenge, not even Emily has lost as much as he has, thanks to Conrad. His wife and brother are both dead because of Conrad and so revenge is still in his heart. Emily tells him that with the death of Fr Paul, it is not likely that Conrad will confess to his crimes anymore. Jack isn’t letting it go. Instead, he tracks down Emily at the car yard where Conrad had his car wreck moved to so that he can destroy any evidence to the contrary of the story he told the police. Jack takes photos and videos of the car and shows them to Emily, just before the wreck is conveniently moved for total destruction under the instructions of Conrad. Thanks to a mechanic friend of Jack’s, they know two things: one being that Conrad was definitely the one behind the wheel when the car crashed, and secondly, that the car brakes had been tampered with, causing the brakes to fail, resulting in the crash. But Jack won’t let Emily have the evidence, determined that he will take it to the police to take Conrad down.

Conrad resumes his role as Master of the House
I started singing “Master of the House” from the musical, Les Miserables, when Conrad called the family together for a meeting to announce that his latest hospital tests show that he does not, and never has had, Huntington’s Disease. In fact, his symptoms are as a result of stress and the Huntington’s meds he had been taking. So now he is resuming his role as master of the Grayson Manor, feeling more invincible than ever.

Beware the green-eyed monster
Since Aiden’s discovery that Emily had declared her love for Jack, the green-eyed monster had been gnawing at his back. It would be nice to think that he can remain loyal to Emily and continue to help her take down the Graysons as her inside man (now that he has moved into the Grayson pool house). However, when he found out that Emily had revealed her true identity to Jack, I can’t help but believe that he is going to let the monster get the better of him and betray Emily. Just as Conrad is demanding that Victoria kick him out of their property, he reveals that he has evidence that Conrad’s car had been tampered with, and that he believes the culprit is Jack. So now the big question is, is Emily in greater danger making an enemy of Aiden? Or is Aiden in danger making an enemy of the queen of revenge?

As Nolan would say, “Have mercy!”

Photo: ABC. Written by Valerie Leung. Find her on (@valshopaholic) and read her blog

Revenge season three continues on Sunday nights on ABC at 9/8c.

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