A Kanye West whale belt and Mitt Romney? It’s New Girl time!

You’re a big girl, you can watch The Walking Dead alone. – Nick

I told him I was checking my fantasy football scores. – Jess
You don’t even know what that is – Nick
No sir, I do not know what that is. – Jess

When you’re going through a “Taylor Swift like range of emotions” I should come over, right? – Cece

I deserve to have a shorty on the side – Jess
That’s the wrong use of shorty. – Nick

It’s after labor day, I’m wearing whales. … I’ll have you guys know that Kanye wore this belt. – Schmidt

Then we just laid there, like two old people in The Notebook, waiting to die. – Jess

Friends help friends have meaningless sex. – Schmidt

Where are you? This place is fancy and I don’t know which fork to kill myself with. – Nick

Loft troll not used to fancy gentleman. – Jess

You’ve been starring at this girl for five minutes. I hope you’re checking her out otherwise you’re a serial killer. – Schmidt

I can afford the valet charge and the “add onions” – Nick

The only thing I know in this world is that this belt is amazing. – Schmidt

You my friend have become her fluffer. An emotional fluffer. – Winston

You’re calling Mitt Romney Dad now, that’s where we’re at? – Cece

What do you think about the New Girl Whale Belt? Nice, huh?

I want a casual sex affair just like in the movies. – Jess

Question: Under what circumstances would you build a dresser for a woman? – Jess

I can’t pleasure a woman and build a dresser at the same time. I’m not gonna lie. – Sam

Never Adele! – Winston

Nitpicking turns me off. You’re all horribly unattractive to me. – Schmidt as Tugg Romney

Get out of here, deviant! – Schmidt

It’s like memory foam. – Schmidt about Cece’s breasts

I can’t let you be in emotional porn. You have too much to offer! – Jess

It’s like high stakes legos – Nick on ikea furniture

Do your thang girl. Get crazy. – Nick

New Girl “Fluffer” Quotes

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