new tv shows

It’s time for mid-season shows to begin! But what do you watch? Where do you start? Stop freaking out, man. Your freaking out freaks ME out, and then we need to go get massages and…hey, you have a pretty good idea. Oh, and I have this handy list of the mid-season TV shows, so stop worrying! We’ve compiled the shows we will and won’t be watching.

ABC

Conveyor Belt of Love – A one hour reality show where people are brought by on a conveyor belt and bachelorettes have signs to indicate if they’re interested or not. I am ashamed to admit that I was planning to mention this show just to mock it, but now I kinda feel like I have to see one of these episodes to see if it reminds me of the old MTV show Singled Out. Oh, the better days.

The Deep End – Not to be confused with the movie with Jason Dohring, this is a TV show. Sadly, it lacks Jason Dohring. It has Tina Majorino, though! Majorino was in Veronica Mars with Dohring, as you should know. This is the show with the previews where there’s a girl in a bra. Yea, I bet you remember it now. Oh wait, that’s half of the TV you see? Hmm…

Lost– The last season. Dun dun dun. I bet there will be a spin-off.

NBC

ChuckZachary Levi owes me five bucks. I guess I might watch anyway. But I DO hold grudges!

Parenthood – This show has Lauren Graham so it’s an automatic win. But seriously, it looks good. Although Modern Family looks a bit like it.

The Celebrity Apprentice – Har, WHO Are the celebrities? Me watching any of this show depends on who the heck is on the show.

Fox

American Idol – This reality show wanted me to watch so badly they had to recruit lovable Ellen DeGeneres as a judge.

Our Little Genius – Another reality show from Fox? What.A.Surpise. I would rather watch episodes of Small Wonder (the show with the robot girl with pigtails and a red dress). This show lets kids win “life-changing money”. So I guess those kids won’t be unbearably stressed and possibly feel guilty for life, huh?

Human Target – Weirdly, NOT a reality TV show. It’s all action and drama for this series based on a comic book. This show has Chi McBride who we know from Pushing Daisies! Still, I probably won’t watch. I don’t like comic books, let alone movies or shows about comic books.

Past Life – It seems kind of like Bones. I mean, there’s no Bones. It’s about souls. The show was inspired by the book Reincarnationist. On the show, investigators help clients resolve issues of their past lives. Dr. Kate Mcginn is all smarts and tries to understand ‘souls’. Her partner is the cynic, with a recently deceased wife. So there’s already lots of possible plotlines. Will the show survive for us to see it all? This might be a great show. I hope it is.

Sons of Tucson – A family comedy with three brothers. I’m bored already. The brothers hire a fake Dad. I’m mildly intrigued. The Dad is played by Jack Black-ish actor Tyler Labine (Reaper). Yea, I’ll give this a watch.



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