This week on Cougar Town, Jules finds out how Christina Aguilera felt when she messed up the words to the national anthem. And she doesn’t like it.

Cougar Town Recap: You’re Gonna Get It – Season 2 Episode 17

Title Card:  Welcome to Cougar Town. Follow @thelarmy right now and thank us later.

The Cul de Sac Crew are all gathered around in Jules’s kitchen (of course) to celebrate Bobby’s entry into his first pro golf tournament in quite some time. Laurie discovers a letter on the counter from the African child Jules sponsors. Of course being Jules, she is annoyed that his letters are repetitive (it’s hot, he’s hungry, blah blah blah) and she wants to volunteer for real. Turns out everyone else already is…

Laurie: I raise money for public schools.

Grayson: I help eradicate non-indigenous species in the Everglades.

Jules: I don’t know what that means.

Bobby: I volunteer at a soup kitchen

Ellie: Being a taster doesn’t count. I volunteer at the homeless shelter.

Jules: So everyone volunteers except Andy and me?

Andy: I volunteer at the homeless shelter too. During the self-defense courses the women take turns kicking me in the crotch.

Grayson: So it’s like a day at home for you.

That is so funny that Laurie tweets it. Ok…. now I hope you are all a part of the Laurie Army on Twitter. Check it out – Laurie is funny in 140 character bursts as well. @TheLarmy

As Bobby heads off to the tourney with his caddy, Andy (natch), the gang sends some good vibes (or twibes, if you are part of The Larmy) and then head off to Grayson’s bar where he has installed bar trivia. Jules doesn’t want to play because is her greatest fear to look dumb in front of everyone. Pretty sure that ship has sailed, but oh well. Laurie doesn’t play because, well, she’s not the brightest bulb. So it will be Grayson v Travis v Ellie. But first they find Bobby’s lucky visor which was left there when Bobby and Andy had lunch at the bar. Jules questions whether or not Andy is the right person to take care of Bobby (cut to the two in a hotel room deciding to find out if Bobby can fit in a duffel bag) and then decides whoever loses trivia has to drive the visor to Bobby because obviously he can’t win without it.

While those three duke it out, Jules goes to Laurie for help to decide what kind of volunteer work she should do. Laurie tries to convince her to participate in the charity she likes – to help keep Blackberrys in the school system to help kids read. Wow. Back at trivia, Travis loses and is charge of visor return. Travis gets upset (which Grayson mocks adorably to Jules’s delight) but heads off the find his dad and Andy. And he does. Of course Bobby is still stuck in the duffel bag. So now Travis is in charge. Jules goes to school with Laurie and takes over the charity. She is kicking butt, until she has to lead the pledge allegiance…. she doesn’t know the correct words.She says Richard Stans instead of “which it stands” (she thought Richard wrote it) Cue full body shut down as her biggest fear is realized!

Jules is of course devastated and drowning her sorrows in Big Carl. But Grayson, being the greatest guy that he is, makes her feel better by pointing out that they are all dumb. Even Ellie admits it is true. Laurie too, but come on. We knew that. At the bar Ellie beat Grayson at trivia, so he wants a rematch, and Laurie gets in on the fun too, which Grayson ad Ellie think is hysterical.

Jules sees a guy smiling at her on the street and freaks out that he knows about the pledge of allegiance incident. She calls Ellie, but when that doesn’t calm her, so she calls Laurie who in her endless wisdom tells Jules the guy is looking at her because she is hot. Well played, Laurie.  Laurie must be on fire, because she is doing well in trivia. But Jules makes them turn it off to see Bobby. Things seem to be starting off well for him, despite the fact that Caddy Andy has water from the pool stuck in his ears and is yelling everything. Jules lets them finish trivia (Laurie wins – “Operation Suck It is complete!”) but any joy is diminished when Barb comes in and lets Jules know she heard about the pledge. Oh Barb….

Bobby is feeling good and wants ‘the hammer’ from Andy. But Andy can’t hear him and asks Bobby to act it out. He does the hammer dance. Oh sweet nostalgia, that was fantastic! At the bar, Jules asks God to take the negative spot light off of her and put it on someone else…. and it works. Bobby’s fantastic shot he just made was actually with his competitor’s ball, which is a two stroke penalty. Sad face.

At home, the crew watches the news where they see that Bobby choked after he hit the wrong ball. Andy even fell into a sand trap. And Bobby has a new nickname…. Bobby “wrong balls” Cobb. Yikes! Despite everyone trying to make him feel better, Bobby leaves in a funk. Jules and Travis fight over who is more to blame (Wizard vs Nerd, according to Grayson) and both leave to apologize.

Laurie wins again and trivia, and Ellie is starting to break. Laurie says Grayson and Ellie can team up to try and beat her. Like NATO, according to Grayson. “Isn’t Nato the guy that lived in OJ’s guest house?” Oy. Guess who is winning?

Jules, Travis and Andy go to find Bobby. Poor Andy still has water in his ear, until Jules wishes it out. And then it all pours out of his ear. Never question Jules and her magic powers! They find a car selling shirts with Bobby’s pic that say “Bobby Wrong Balls Cobb” so Jules buys what’s left and the three go to find the 10 the guy already sold. They both apologize and then discover the t-shirts…. Bobby’s idea to make money off of his misfortune!

As Bobby, Jules and Travis discuss how the deal with humiliation, Laurie texts Travis for help with the trivia (there had to be reason she was winning!) and with a little extra help from Bobby, Travis helps Laurie win! Grayson freaks out. And Jules, Travis and Bobby crack up realizing what is happening. Bobby tells Jules that despite her magic powers, it’s not her fault. And then shows her that he doesn’t care because now he is a cultural phenomenon. He owns it, and she needs to own her mistakes too. She goes back to do the real pledge for the kids…. but gets it wrong again.This time invisible instead of indivisible, you know, because God is invisible. Oh Jules…

Cougar Town Quotes:

Grayson: What, does your college just let anyone in?
Travis: No. You have to be really good at art…..so yeah.

Laurie: John Hancock is a real person? I just thought it was a sex act.

Grayson: Bad news is you have to drive two hours to return a magical visor which is full of dreams and rainbows… (Jules approaches)….which are real and important.

Laurie: Wrong Balls is trending on Twitter. It’s above Bieber.

Jules: Travis, blaming yourself for someone else’s actions is ridiculous. Besides, I made this happen. by wishing it so. I  really abused my powers.

Laurie: Wow! Big brains and rocking hoots and stems? Just goes to show you: never judge a book… by it’s front part!

Written by Melissa Miller. Follow her on Twitter @serrae

Read Small Screen Scoop every day. Jules wished for you to do it, so now you have to!

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