Best ‘Brooklyn 99’ Quotes — “You breaking bad? You cooking meth? How many phones do you have?”

Here are the best ‘Brooklyn 99’ quotes from the episode “The Bet.” If you are looking for Brooklyn 99 quotes from another episode: Brooklyn 99 quotes.

BROOKLYN NINE-NINE: Det. Jake Peralta (Andy Samberg, C) helps Det. Amy Santiago (Melissa Fumero, L) avoid watching a strip show in the “The Bet” episode of BROOKLYN NINE-NINE airing Tuesday, Jan. 14 (8:30-9:00 PM ET/PT) on Fox. ©2013 Fox Broadcasting Co. CR: Eddy Chen/FOX

Best Brooklyn 99 Quotes – “The Bet”

“If you really knew me, you would have said ‘crushing debt.'” – Jake Peralta

“Thor would never wager his hammer.” – Boyle

Boyle: “Have you seen Rosa?”
Gina: “Rosa died 8 years ago.”

“Date time, time to date!” – Jake Peralta

“There’s plenty of embaressing to do and only a few hours to do it.” – Jake Peralta

“That horse is a damn hero.” – Gina

“I spent one whole dollar on this ring. Will you go on the worst date ever with me? You have to say yes.” – Jake Peralta

“You’re not allowed to fall in love with me.” – Jake Peralta

“When you finally go out with me – and you will – it’ll be because I do things that only Charles Boyle would do.” – Boyle

“I’m sad ya’ll are arresting me, but I’m excited you’re back together.” – Criminal

“I think I’m getting a text message….boop.” –

“I get snacky.” – Jake Peralta

“You cooking meth? You breaking bad? How many phones do you have?”

“How much did you spend on tonight?” – Boyle
“$1,400, but it’s all on credit cards, so it’s like $5 a month for the next 2,000 years.” – Jake Peralta

“You live in you ex-wife’s new boyfriend’s basement, I’m not taking advice from you.”

Detective Santiago: Permission to go to the bathroom?
Detective Peralta: Granted. First of three, use them wisely.