antm 13

“Shut up, shut up, that’s how girls get BEAT UP!”

Drama, drama, drama. That’s what America’s Next Top Model had in spades last night. While Tyra Banks continued to wear completely ridiculous 80’s inspired fashion,we saw more of the in-house drama between the girls than we have seen yet this season. As the contestants are sent away and we’re left with a smaller group, there’s more airtime to focus on the little complaints from each specific girl. What’s funny is that it never seems to be consistently shown as just one girl who lives for drama. Some, as we saw, create it more than others (read: Alasia, Angelea), but none of the gals seem to be immune to the catty behavior that gives all females of this 18-25 age bracket a bad name.

Referencing Cycle 1 Because I Miss the Quality of CatFights:

In this episode, it was Alasia and Angelea who pumped up the volume on dramatics. This means outbursts of yelling, instigating fights – Alasia even stood outside of another girls confessional while she vented, just to call her on it all. If someone wants to vent in private, I think that’s better than airing all of these grievances in public. Alasia called the girl (Raina) fake for acting like she didn’t want to bitch everyone else out. but it seems like Raina is just finding a way to vent that doesn’t include making everyone else pissed. It reminds me of cycle 1’s Elyse Sewell and how she had to vent in the confessional just to make it through a day. To retaliate, when Alasia went into the confessional, saying gems like: “Shut up, shut up, that’s how girls get BEAT UP!” Raina and Jessica listened and pretended to fight the way they see Alasia doing (this involves lots of crazy hand gestures).

Why America Needs Oprah:

The ‘challenge’ this week was to learn how to dress like a model aka dressing for your body type. It’s surprising how you can live almost 20 years and still not realize what kind of body you have. This is why Oprah has to do a show on this every month! All of the girls picked out outfits to flatter themselves, and there was no winner – they all got to keep their clothing (picked from the Seventeen magazine fashion closet).

Tinsley Who?

A real challenge came in the form of a CW network tie-in where the girls attended the purse launch for Tinsley Mortimer (who has a new reality TV show on The CW called High Society, which I will never watch another second of – that is how bad it is). If you only knew Tinsley from magazines, red carpets, and cameos like this – you might actually like her. But if you’ve seen her show..ugh.

Riding in Subway Cars with Bitches:

At the photo shoot down in the subway system, Nicole Fox, winner from the previous cycle, was there. She looked radiant and gorgeous and ungh, why can’t there be girls of this caliber every cycle? Angela asked Nicole about how to stay out of drama, and Nicole said to stay classy and be true to yourself. Angela doesn’t really do classy. The new friendship trio of Jessica, Raina and Brenda also found that amusing. While they’ve become friends, Alasia, Angela and Krista seem kind of friend-like. Anslee and Alexandra just float about.

Makeup to Forget:

The photo shoot was for Cover Girl and the eye shadow blaster thingy (hey, let’s put things named BLAST near our fragile eyes!), and the makeup artist mentioned it only about five hundred times. That’s product placement for the ANNOYING fail. I don’t care how often they mention the stuff, it didn’t even really look good when they used it. So they didn’t sell it to me.

Laugh and Cry and Get all Hormonal, and P.S. Your Bones Age You:

Jay didn’t feel like helping Jessica the “club kid”, Alasisa “model on a go-see” giggled like crazy through the shoot until the end when Jay mentioned her photos were horrible and the giggling turned to tears, Angelea “fashionista” did well because looking snobby is her thing, and Jay informed the camera that Brenda looked old because of her bones.What are you gonna do, get plastic surgery? Yea, that’s something to promote to the teens. “Sorry Mom, my bones make me look 20 years older than I AM!” I’d like to hear that argument.

The Dreckitude:

When it came to panel, the girls all wore their latest clothing picks. The show wants them to look more presentable for panel. Ha. In terms of photos, Raina had a good one, but it wasn’t her best. It seemed like Jessica would have a good photo, but the one selected for her wasn’t super hot. (These are both girls who’ve had best picture in the house, and I think the show realizes that it’s difficult to keep giving the best picture to the same girls – so they have to pick bad photos for them sometimes.) Krista had a great photo, although I’ve never warmed to her. Brenda had a bad photo, but I think it shouldn’t go without note that her styling was really horrible and that can affect a model’s feeling and the judges reaction to a shot. In an ideal world, a model can make even a paper bag look fashionable. But it doesn’t help when all of the other models get to wear silk dresses. Whenever this sort of things happens, I feel pretty sure that behind the scenes conversations are going on about which girls the producers and Tyra would like to get preference.

Ignoring Alexandra:

Andre Leon Talley, who always adores Alasia, though she had a bad photo. What’s funny is that I really can’t stand Alasia, but I’ll admit that she’s one of those people who takes amazing photos. Anslee had an okay photo, but I can tell the judges aren’t wild about her. Alexandra had a wonderful photo, and one of the judges said they’d cast her in a beauty shoot. Why not just any shoot? Is it because she’s plus sized?

Bitches be Winning:

Sadly, Angela had the best picture of the bunch – even though her personality makes her a witch.

They Hate Your Shoes:

Jessica was called third to last, and Tyra said it was because of her combative personality during judging that makes people not want to work with her. For the record, this combative attitude is when Talley said Jessica’s shoes were ugly and the girl asked “are you kidding?” actually confused, and went on to say that she liked them. I didn’t view that as combative at all. But apparently they take Jessica’s innocent charm to Talley’s word: “Dreck-HOLLA”. Really?

Everybody Hates Brenda:

The remaining two girls were Alasia and Brenda. Considering everyone loves Alasia and no one liked Brenda, it was a predictable outcome. They just wanted to scare Alasia. As for Brenda, Tyra blamed the girl for not being able to work her new, edgy, hairdo. Well, Tyra – that’ll happen when you pick something for a girl that is totally not her personality. Blaming – not the haircut, but her inability to make the haircut work (after having it cut twice, and admitting it wasn’t right) is really just crap. I feel bad for Brenda, even though she was as boring as beige paint.

Sirlinksalot: America’s Next Top Model